31-33

03:48
Casey Garland
Casey Garland

Story

 

31-33 is the last song written in the collection and the simplest one too. Several years after my divorce I was getting pretty lonely. What's does a 62 year old river guide do to get a date? (BTW, guitars are not really chick magnets). In a moment of weakness I signed up on Match.com. Sure was fun window shopping all the ladies, but they all seemed to be looking for something other than a whitewater addict. It's true, "1,200 women looked to see, one big gal she wrote to me." After 6 months of that tease, I bailed and in a moment of self-deprecation I sat down and penned 31-33.

I was so embarrassed and scared stiff at my first public performance of the song, but our little trio pulled if off and to my complete surprise, the audience went wild and loved it. This was quite an eye opener for me - that such a simple song could be more appreciated than other songs I've written which are much more complex. Now Jeff Tassin's brilliant production has taken the song to a whole new level. Is this a potential hit song? You decide.

Lyrics

31 -33  Casey Garland

 

Thirty one - thirty three,   they don’t make pants for me

Thirty two - thirty four, my cuffs are draggin’ on the floor

Thirty one - thirty three,  Skinny White Boy yeah that’s me.

 

When I ask girls for a date, they don’t even hesitate whoa

They point me to the door, “don’t you come calling here no more”

Now I don’t know what to do, way down south I’m feeling blue.

 

I’m a slender Caucasian of the male persuasion

I don’t bark and  I don’t bite.

Still got my teeth and hair, just not no derrière’

Can’t help it if I was born slight.

 

Now I’ve been lonely way too long. So I signed up – Match dot com

Twelve hundred women looked to see. One BIG gal she wrote to me.

So I sat down wrote this song.   Doctor Phil you got it wrong.

 

Thirty one – thirty three, I think it’s plain to see

That I’m truly in a funk, maybe I should be a monk.

Pull the blinds and lock the door, I just can’t take it anymore

 

I’m a slender Caucasian of the male persuasion

I don’t bark and  I don’t bite.

Still got my teeth and hair, just not no derrière’

Can’t help it if I was born slight.

 

I think I will unplug the phone, she will call I won’t be home

I’ll be downtown drinking gin, not pumpin’ iron at the gym

That’s the last you’ll hear from me.  Thirty one – thirty three.

Thirty one - thirty three  Skinny White Boy yeah that's me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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